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Abuse in families is something that happens far too often and receives very little attention within the Christian community. Those of us who have experienced abuse within our marriage may have turned to our church for help and guidance, only to be mocked and scorned.
As Christians, we are taught to “turn the other cheek,” and to “forgive and pray for our abusers”. While forgiveness is crucial to our own spiritual well-being, and we are commanded by God to “pray without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17), it is this very teaching that keeps victims of abuse and domestic violence trapped in unsafe and unhealthy situations by teaching them that it is their Christian duty to remain in a volatile and unsafe environment, thus enabling the abuser to continue abusing his/her victim(s).
Abuse in all it’s ugly forms has been a curse in my family for countless generations. As much as it pains me to admit it, abuse is all I have EVER known. I have endured horrific child and sexual abuse. I have endured spiritual abuse within churches. And I have endured a toxic and abusive marriage for nearly twenty-five years.
Fear and shame causes the victim to live in silence as the abuse escalates, as seeking the desperately needed help of specially trained professionals or exiting the relationship can and often does cause the abuse to escalate and may even prove to be deadly for the victim. Sadly, this is why so many people choose to stay in abusive relationships.
As Christians, it’s hard to know how to navigate abuse with grace and yet respect for yourself and protection for yourself and your family. Today, I want to share a podcast from Awesome Marriage where Dr. Kim and Christina tackle this difficult topic and provide some encouragement for those dealing with the trauma of abuse.
Click here to listen to the podcast!
***Please note that if you experiencing ANY form of abuse in your relationship, YOU ARE NOT ALONE! IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT! It’s okay to be afraid. I understand what you are going through. I’ve been there too. I’m still there. Please do all that you can to stay safe and get the help that you so desperately need and deserve for yourself, your husband, and your kids! If you are unsure of where to turn to seek help, or unsure if you are being abused, please visit my Resources page for further guidance.***