Mental Illness in Marriage

15 Scriptures to Help You Tame your Venomous Tongue

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Set a guard over my mouth, LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips.

~Psalm 141:3~

I’m generally a really sweet person and pretty quiet.  That is until some poor unfortunate soul pisses me off.  And when that poor unfortunate soul happens to be my husband or even my kids…

Lord have mercy!

A three-headed fire-breathing dragon emerges and burns everyone in her path to a crisp with her harsh and ugly words.  And on really bad days when I am exceptionally pissed off, three more heads emerge that also breath fire and spew deadly venom with every word I scream.

While I do not take any pride in likening myself to a dragon, there really seems to be no better example to describe my hideous temper and foul mouth that has been sadly very well known to out-cuss just about anyone and destroy all who are in my path.

Sadly, this un-pretty dragon-like side of me is something that I have waged war against my entire life.  Sometimes people like me, who have endured a lifetime of abuse, and live with multiple psychological illnesses can have a very difficult time regulating their emotions as well as their tongues and response to people, places, and things.  This is why I am so eternally grateful for an ever-loving and patient heavenly Father who compassionately understands the depths of my struggle.  He is always faithful to lovingly chastise me, showing me where I’ve gone wrong, as He guides me on the path of righteousness.

A three-headed fire-breathing dragon emerges and burns everyone in her path to a crisp with her harsh and ugly words.  ~Clara J Chauteco

The more I read and study my Bible, the more I realize the incredible power our words have.  Our words truly do contain the power to give life or take it away, (Proverbs 18:21).  This is why it is imperative to learn how to tame our wild tongues and get them under the control of the Holy Spirit if we are to have happy, healthy, homes, marriages and families.

If you struggle with your temper and your words getting both the best and the worst of you, here are some verses that will help you tame your venomous tongue.

  1. Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.                     (Proverbs 18:21 KJV)
  2. Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.   (Colossians 4:6 KJV)
  3. Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.  (Ephesians 4:29 KJV)
  4. In the multitude of words there wanteth not sin: but he that refraineth his lips is wise.  (Proverbs 10:19 KJV)
  5. A soothing tongue [speaking words that build up and encourage] is a tree of life,
    But a perversive tongue [speaking words that overwhelm and depress] crushes the spirit. (Proverbs 15:4 AMP)
  6. Not that which goeth into the mouth defileth a man; but that which cometh out of the mouth, this defileth a man.  (Matthew 15:11 KJV)
  7. Whoso keepeth his mouth and his tongue keepeth his soul from troubles.  (Proverbs 21:23 KJV)
  8. She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. (Proverbs 31:26 KJV)
  9. Set a guard over my mouth, LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips.  (Psalm 141:3 KJV)
  10. He that hath knowledge spareth his words: and a man of understanding is of an excellent spirit. Even a fool, when he holdeth his peace, is counted wise: and he that shutteth his lips is esteemed a man of understanding.     ( Proverbs 17:27-28 KJV)
  11. There is that speaketh like the piercings of a sword: but the tongue of the wise is health. – Proverbs 12:18
  12. A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.  The tongue of the wise useth knowledge aright: but the mouth of fools poureth out foolishness.  (Proverbs 15:1-2 KJV)
  13. The selfish man quarrels against every sound principle of conduct by demanding his own way. A rebel doesn’t care about the facts. All he wants to do is yell.  Sin brings disgrace.  A wise man’s words express deep streams of thought.  It is wrong for a judge to favor the wicked and condemn the innocent.  A fool gets into constant fights. His mouth is his undoing! His words endanger him.What dainty morsels rumors are. They are eaten with great relish! (Proverbs 18 1-8 TLB)
  14. Yanking a dog’s ears is no more foolish than interfering in an argument that isn’t any of your business.  A man who is caught lying to his neighbor and says, “I was just fooling,” is like a madman throwing around firebrands, arrows, and death!  Fire goes out for lack of fuel, and tensions disappear when gossip stops.  A quarrelsome man starts fights as easily as a match sets fire to paper.  Gossip is a dainty morsel eaten with great relish.  Pretty words may hide a wicked heart, just as a pretty glaze covers a common clay pot.  A man with hate in his heart may sound pleasant enough, but don’t believe him; for he is cursing you in his heart. Though he pretends to be so kind, his hatred will finally come to light for all to see.  The man who sets a trap for others will get caught in it himself. Roll a boulder down on someone, and it will roll back and crush you.  Flattery is a form of hatred and wounds cruelly. (Proverbs 26:17-28 TLB)
  15. Dear brothers, don’t be too eager to tell others their faults, for we all make many mistakes; and when we teachers of religion, who should know better, do wrong, our punishment will be greater than it would be for others.  If anyone can control his tongue, it proves that he has perfect control over himself in every other way. We can make a large horse turn around and go wherever we want by means of a small bit in his mouth.  And a tiny rudder makes a huge ship turn wherever the pilot wants it to go, even though the winds are strong. So also the tongue is a small thing, but what enormous damage it can do. A great forest can be set on fire by one tiny spark. And the tongue is a flame of fire. It is full of wickedness, and poisons every part of the body. And the tongue is set on fire by hell itself and can turn our whole lives into a blazing flame of destruction and disaster. Men have trained, or can train, every kind of animal or bird that lives and every kind of reptile and fish, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is always ready to pour out its deadly poison. Sometimes it praises our heavenly Father, and sometimes it breaks out into curses against men who are made like God. And so blessing and cursing come pouring out of the same mouth. Dear brothers, surely this is not right! Does a spring of water bubble out first with fresh water and then with bitter water? Can you pick olives from a fig tree, or figs from a grape vine? No, and you can’t draw fresh water from a salty pool. (James 3:1-12 TLB)

Gracious and merciful Father in heaven, thank You for giving me the gift of Your Holy Spirit.  For with this gift, You have also given me the power of self-control.  Your holy and living Word teaches me that there is great power in my tongue.  With it, I can bring a man to life, or kill him. Lord, let my words bring life!  Let my words be a healing balm to my husband, children and all whom I encounter.  Let me speak only of Your unfailing love and mercy, or let me not speak at all, Lord.

In Jesus Holy name, I pray, Amen.

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